10 Ways to Practice Self Love

Self love looks a little different for everyone. We all have a unique way of loving ourselves. If you're unsure about how to start showing yourself some love, here are some thought-starters for how to do it today and every day

  1. Connect with what’s most important to you - whether it’s alone time, time with friends, dancing with music loud, listening to your favorite podcast or curling up reading a good book, find what rejuvenates you and prioritize and make time for it as much as you can in your week.

  2. Create a self-love ritual - a weekly essential oil bath, or long shower and massage your body lovingly with lotion after, or go for a walk/run or cycle or write yourself a weekly gratitude note with all the things you value about yourself.

  3. Connect with community - We all need the support and love from people around us to stay motivated and on track. Research shows that positive energy is contagious, so whether you're building a network or planning to go to a social event, or just connecting with a few close people, it's always important to have a community you value around you regularly.

  4. Treat your body as if you truly love it - Be intentional about how you talk about your body, what you say to it when you look in the mirror and thoughtful about what you put into your body. Not because you want to look good but because you want to feel good. It will not only boost self love it will increase your energy. Feeding your body nutrient-rich foods, a loving touch and kind words, will have you oozing love out of every pore.

  5. Celebrate your strengths instead of comparing yourself to others - it is so easy to get caught up comparing yourself to others, especially with social media. Remember that these positive pics on the Internet don't always tell the whole story, and everyone has bad days. Focus instead on all the great things you bring to the world, and all the things you want to create or build next. Keep your energy and attention there.

  6. Do something you’re good at - Self-esteem and self-love often go hand in hand, and participating in a hobby you're good at will not only boost your endorphins but will bring out the best version of you. If you love to cook, then cook! If you love to sing, then grab that mic, if you love to run, head outside, and run.

  7. Find your happy place - it might be a corner of your home, or a spot in the park, by the water, your favorite restaurant, your local church or community group, or the gym. Wherever it is, go there whenever you need to. Fill yourself often with the places and spaces that make you smile.

  8. Write a gratitude journal - make a list each day of all the things you’re grateful for. All the things that went well that day, or week, even on those heavy days. Remind yourself at least one thing that you appreciate and value. Be patient with yourself and give yourself some grace. We are often much harder on ourselves than on anyone else. Be purposeful with your words, practice and offer yourself patience.

  9. Prioritize YOUR needs and set boundaries where you need them - so often we may put others’ needs before our own, or feel the dreaded to do list has to get done before I focus on me. Some days, what is most needed is to pause, to rest and to rearrange your time to prioritize you. That may mean saying no to helping someone on that day, that may mean setting boundaries around your availability for work responses or calls with friends, it may mean letting some things drop or it may mean asking for support. The more you practice this, the easier it becomes and the more room for ease and joy you’ll let in to your life.

  10. Practice the art of releasing - We're constantly holding onto things in our past, which can weigh heavy on our souls and even give us low self-esteem. Our minds spend so much time replaying the shoulda, coulda, woulda show. This not only lowers our energy and keeps us stuck in a cycle of procrastination, judgement or blame, it also is fruitless as we cannot control what has passed. When you see yourself stuck holding onto a story or situation, ask yourself, what do I want now?, what can I chose to do next? If you still find yourself stuck, write it out and burn it or throw it away, talk it out with someone you trust, move it out of your body through dance or exercise.

Self-love, whilst it may have become a word you see everywhere now, it really is a set of habits and behaviors that show yourself and others that you are worthy of care, your time is valuable and your thoughts and feelings matter. Research shows the more love and compassion you show yourself, the more you share and show that to others too.

Put that mask on yourself, before you help others with theirs. And if you are struggling to find your mask, lean in to someone to support you - a loved one, a close friend, a trusted mentor/coach or a therapist. You are not alone.

With love, today and always!

Maria Neve